


you were happy being someone

by arrows



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Pre-Canon, First Kiss, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-06
Updated: 2016-03-06
Packaged: 2018-05-25 00:01:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6171991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arrows/pseuds/arrows
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's tempting. But John — drunk, impulsive, reckless John — just pulls away, making some dumb joke instead that none of them will remember 15 minutes later.</p>
            </blockquote>





	you were happy being someone

**Author's Note:**

> four times laurens almost kissed burr and one time he did!
> 
> shoutout to aaron for fueling how absolutely trash i am for this ship, and kaisha and rhys for making me actually post it. <3
> 
> (cw for alcohol, but that's kinda expected with laurens lbr)

ONE.  Everyone in the entire state of New York probably knows, by now, that John Laurens is an affectionate drunk — the number of times he’s ended up with an arm wrapped around Hercules’ shoulders or sitting half in Gilbert’s lap in some dark back corner of whatever the bar of the night is would probably be too many to _count._ Tonight, Burr sits next to him, and John ends up half–draped over him, drunk and filled with too much love for his friends to contain in his small frame. And he’s about four inches away from burr’s face, and it’s not subtle _at all_ when his gaze flicks down to Burr’s mouth, to where the alcohol on both their breaths is intermixing in the air. It’s _tempting._  But John — drunk, impulsive, _reckless_ John — just pulls away, making some dumb joke instead that none of them will remember 15 minutes later.

TWO.   They contrast. Burr’s hesitance, Burr’s introspectiveness, Burr’s quiet emotions that _build up_ until he finally lets them escape; John’s constant motion and sound, always too passionate to hold anything in. So it was inevitable that they’d argue, a miracle that they haven’t until now, and John’s not even sure how it started at this point, all he knows is that halfway through the fight he gets tired of arguing. And that’s _new_. But Burr’s voice is so smooth and soft and _convincing_ , and John really didn’t want to fight him that much in the first place; he’s been restless, looking for a fight, and Burr just happened to say something he  _slightly_ disagreed with, but there wasn’t even really any conflict to it. So he stops. And he looks at Burr. They’re close at this point, and it would be _easy_ to just lean in and kiss him, and he’s a little surprised to find that he _wants to_ , but he stops himself, takes a step back. Not tonight.

THREE.  John doesn’t realize how much Burr means to him until they’re in the midst of a battle and a bullet goes whizzing past, and it doesn’t even come _close_ to hitting Laurens, but it flies an inch from Burr’s head and John could swear time slows down for a second as he holds his breath and waits for the _thunk_ that says it’s hit his friend. It doesn’t connect, just speeds right past, and there's a sigh of relief from both men before the battle continues. After the fight is done (it’s short, ending before the sun even sets, not many casualties on either side)he finds Burr sitting at a campfire alone. Laurens sits next to him, and for once in his life he’s silent, looking at him for a second before just leaning into the other man, the gentle companionship somehow seeming _right_ after the events of the day.

FOUR.  They’re back to where it started — a dark bar, almost empty at this time of night, Hercules and Lafayette having left already and leaving John alone with Burr. It’s a miracle, John thinks, that Burr hasn’t noticed yet how John’s gaze keeps drifting to his lips, not quite as drunk anymore but still too buzzed to be inconspicuousabout it — he laughs, leaning his head on Aaron’s shoulder and closing his eyes, the soft lull of conversation around them leaving him content to just exist in this moment. He _trusts_  Burr a surprising amount, enough to almost fall asleep on his shoulder, enough to almost just lean up and kiss him right there, sleepily and sloppily, but he doesn’t do either.  

+ONE.  In the end, John’s not drunk (on beer or adrenaline from battle)when he does it. He doesn’t tend to share quiet, peaceful moment with the rest of his friends; Lafayette and Hercules are just as passionate and loud as he is, their conversations always turning bold and revolutionary, no room for serenity. Aaron, however, he’s okay with being quiet with, trusts the other man enough to just sit and talk with him for as long as they want. It’s dark out, and they’re sitting outside John’s tent, the stars stretching out vast above them, talking quietly about the future — it’s not something John usually likes to think about, but it all sounds so nice coming out of Aaron’s mouth, not quite optimistic but not hopeless by a long shot. And it’s not exactly a surprise when John leans over and kisses him, lips pressed against Aaron’s for just a quick second, the nervous smile on his face as he pulls away so different from his usual cocky smirk. 

(The next time, Aaron leans in to kiss John, and while his speech is constantly measured and careful his kisses are passionate, leaving John frozen for a moment as his brain explodes with thoughts until he gathers enough sense to  _kiss back_ , and it’s perfect.)

**Author's Note:**

> hmu on twitter @johniaurens if you wanna chat! and feel free to leave comments, i haven't written fic in a while so any critique/compliments/criticism is welcome! thanks for reading!  
> title from north by north by faded paper figures.


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